Sunday, March 8, 2009
Today is a hard day. I just feel like crying all the time. I am so tired of wanting my life back and knowing that will never happen. I don't understand me at all. I want to go on and find someone to share the rest of my life with. God, will I always be alone, so alone. It feels like everyone has gone on to have a life and here I am still alone. I know You are here for me but I am so scared that I will always be alone in this world. I feel like I don't connect with anyone that wants to date me and the one I want has someone else. I really feel like he's the one but maybe not. I just need to feel peace in the waiting for Your perfect will. The fear of being alone is almost too much for me to bear. I don't want to fill that lonliness with just anyone, but the pain is so hard. Jesus, please help me live in today and be grateful for what I do have. Healthy children, a great job, a place to live, and You.